Sellin Shit.

Today was my second day as a sales representative for a company that I would like to remain anonymous for the time being, mostly because it sucks and because it is a mockery of what I consider a craft. However, as my quest to become a marketing extraordinaire continues even this joke of a job has taught me something.

For many people, sales is a way of life and as a marketing major, sales should be an integral part of my life as well. However, this is not the case. Sales to me is an minimal and quite frankly an exhausted attempt to sell something that does not have the power to sell itself. And while I succeed in the area of sales immensely, I have quickly discovered that selling a product that is not up to par is not my forte. My ultimate desire is to create a product and an ad for that product that will allow the product to sell itself.

Prada, Chanel, Louis Vuitton....they don't need sales representatives, even non-high end companies like Coke, Pepsi, Banana Republic, Gap don't need sales reps...their brand and products speak for themselves and therefore sell themselves.

-Shanique.

Coca-cola, marketing extraordinaire.

In my own personal quest to become a marketing extraordinaire, I often take notice to the sly schemes posed by many big name corporations. Today, while shopping the local Shop-Rite, I came across yet another way that companies are downsizing their products while managing to maintain their revenues. The Coca-Cola Company is one of these companies, completely revamping its product to be more "convenient"for the consumer and less costly to the distributor.


As many of you may or may not know, I am an avid Coke drinker. Disgusted by Pepsi and all products manufactured under that name, I now have yet another reason to cling to my beloved Coke. The new Coca-Cola 2 liter bottles (pictured below) mostly certainly do not hold 2 liters. The new bottle which is both shorter and more narrow than most conventional 2 liter bottles, cannot in anyway hold the same amount of fluid as the old bottles.





Both intrigued and humored by this, I decided to seek out Coke's reasons for the switch. Published clearly on the website, Coke claims that the new bottle is reminiscent of the glass bottles from earlier days...whatever Coke. You don't have to fib, I will still purchase your products alongside your many other unwitting and completely oblivious customers.



-Shanique.

GAGA.

I have for sometime now, had my eyes set on a new item to add to my collection of random, completely useless things. Pictured below is a gigantor poster of, you guessed it, Lady Gaga. Due to my new found obsession with the NYU alum (drop-out) and my passion for randomness; I have decided to acquire this Mona-Lisa-esque work of art.


It currently hangs in the 14th Street window of the soon to be closed VirginMegastore and will soon be owned by yours truly. Thankfully, VirginMegatore is extremely desperate to sell literally everything from the posters lining the walls to the toilet paper in the bathrooms.

-Shanique.

4 A.M. Rant.

Hello All,

Tonight, I experienced for the very first time the wonders of coffee (highly caffeinated drink designed to keep one awake for long hours of the night). It is approximately 4am and I'm still quite wakeful (new word I learned a few seconds ago, complements of thesaurus.com). Despite the fact that I have a final exam tomorrow that is very important(I HAVE to pass), I am still awake. Perhaps it is my anxiety keeping me awake or maybe it is the caffeine. In any case, I would like to thank (kill) you Starbucks for providing me with an interesting paradox. Your coffee (highly caffeinated drink designed to keep one awake for long hours of the night) has allowed me to both study(typing really fast with Crystal) ferociously while also keeping me awake long enough to experience sleep deprivation, which will undermine all the studying(typing really fast with Crystal) that your drink allowed me to do in the first place.

This is clearly a conspiracy.

Because I stayed up all night tonight, I will need another cup of coffee (highly caffeinated drink designed to keep one awake for long hours of the night but also works during the day) to properly function tomorrow, thus forcing me and other college students like me to purchase more of your products.

Despite my apparent discontent, I appreciate your business saviness and will succumb to your marketing strategies, enjoying another Starbucks product tomorrow. You, Starbucks, will be added to my list of marketing geniuses (companies who receive large amounts of my money) of whose products I enjoy and use frequently. Those companies also include Orbit gum, Bullhead Jean company, and the greatest marketing genius of them all, New York University.

-Shanique.

Drunken State.

Hello all,

I am currently intoxicated and it feels GREAT. For you lames who have never been in tis state, you should seriously consider it. This will probably by full of grammatical and spelling mistakes, but that's okay, because it's my blog and I can blog in whatever manner that I feel like.

Today, I realized that evrything is great and Xan is great too. If you haven't met her. you should she's great. cuz she is a trapeze arrtist from Lancaster, Pa. That's amish country. Amish.

This paragraph will be about me., I am great. You are not as great as me. Okay.? Pickle surprise

.THIS IS A FRIDAY NIGHT AT 2AM AND WHEN MY FRIENDS ARE COMING BACK, FUCKED UP ON PI˜NA COLADAS, I AM HERE DOING FUCKING LAME SHIT.

post my fucking blog.